“So…Why NOT You?”
Author Noel Pinnock, B.S., M.P.A., C.A., CCC
“A lot of people have gone further than they thought they could because someone else thought they could.” This is a profound statement, whose author is unknown; however, the resonating message is that someone else believes in you – your knowledge, skills, and abilities. This is a powerful notion because our existence is predicated by the way we believe other people perceive us. Even the most narcissist isn’t immune to the power, influence, and phenomenon of the “others factor.” Psychologist refers to this as the self-fulfilling prophecy; whereby, our behavior is influenced by the way we believe others perceive us; hence, the popularized Pygmalion Effect:
– I am not what I think I am
– I am not what you think I am
– BUT I am what I think YOU think I am!
You can see this principle play out well in classrooms to offices across the globe in practically every industry imaginable. In a previous D-mars article, I wrote that Gerry Fusco, CEO of Gerry Fusco Consulting Group, once told me that his father would tell him that he is no better than anyone else and no one else is better than him. This gave him a neutral foundation with everyone he encountered. He was not intimidated by stature, titles, positions, education, etc. He had a general understanding that he could go anywhere and do practically anything that some else did and possibly do it even better. He believed so because his father believed he could but it did not stop with his father’s belief, he had to believe it for himself too. We can find ourselves on a brink of a breakthrough and then doubt enters our psyche and our breakthrough looks more and more like a breakdown and we fizzle out like an extinguishing flame.
So, how do you prevent the fizzle and ignite your sizzle. Well, you have to start with yourself and ask the poignant and burning question, why not me? “Why not me” is self-awareness and inflection question that is aimed at digging deep into your internal belief systems. As you know our beliefs produce our thoughts, our thoughts produce our feelings, and our feelings produce our actions. If you are not taking the action you need to take your marriage, career, business, or parenting to the next level, then I would recommend that you:
- Conduct a belief self-assessment to determine what’s at the core of “you.” Once you, decide to believe in your imminent success or accomplishment, then…
- Develop an action plan that will assist you along the life cycle of this venture, project, etc. but it is all too paramount that you…
- Surround yourself around others that believe in your vision and can see the end result with clarion lenses, naysayers are not allowed here. Remember, we innately do more when others believe we can.
Let me say that again, we innately do more when we believe that others believe that we can. I can remember when I was a gymnast and was competing for the gold in a middle school gymnastic tournament at Welch Middle School way back in the ‘80s. I was nervous and the competition was fierce but I can remember my Pershing Middle School coach, Nancy Shrull, who whispered the powerful words of encouragement, “I believe you can take it all.” These words ignited a flame in my heart that solidified my belief that instigated my thought, fueled my feelings that produced the gold medal winning actions. See, it is a cycle and when you know the cycle then I recommend that you enjoy the ride. Be mindful… a lot of people have gone further than they thought they could because someone else thought they could; therefore, I leave you with the resonating question, why not you? I believe you can…so should you